Saturday, August 10, 2013

Block'd

It's been awhile since I have come to this forum to dish out my woes, but I am finding myself running into something more and more often as of late. I'm feeling...

Block'd.

Writer's Block'd that is.

Well, I wouldn't say it is writer's block exactly... more like distracted as fuck.

As some of you may know, I am currently working on my first novel endeavour. And while it's singly the most awesome thing I have ever attempted in my life, it is also the hardest. Counting from beginning to end, I have had this novel in me wee little noggin for almost 3 years now. I have been fervently writing said novel down since the beginning of the year. With all that said, I think I am doing pretty swell. I am currently about half way done with the first draft. Considering I didn't rrreeeaally start writing shit down until March, I think I am doing pretty effing swell, yo!

But...
As the chapters go on,
As the World turns...
The days get hotter,
The hours get longer...

Fuck my life if I can't sit down for more than an hour at a time and hammer out my awesome ideas.
They really are pretty awesome.
I don't pretend to be original in my ideas or anything, don't misunderstand me. It's pretty easy to see where my influences come from: various writer's styles, several movies, songs, scenes, video games...

Hell, I'm literally writing a fucked up version of Alice in Wonderland. I am not trying to hide it either.
But, I do have to say, that my ideas and the way I put things together are pretty enjoyable, and I do think that the novel, when it reaches completion, will make a fun read.

But... Fucking Summer... Has me distracted with all the things.
I mean, there's the beach, the pool, drinking with friends, Netflix, Nook books, playing with my pussy (My Cat, Eiko, Pervs!) and many, many other things that tempt me away from writing down my awesome tale.

Take today for instance.
I finally have a whole day off. No work, no plans (not until evening time anyway), nothing to do, I should get some hella work done, yeah? You would think! 5k words at least! That's like, a whole chapter! Should be easy!

Nope.

How much did I write today?
400 words.
Yeah, 400 fucking words.
That's it.
That's like 3 paragraphs.

Fuck.

What else did I do today?
Woke up, worked out, ate eggs (awesome eggs!), read some book thing, took a nap, wrote some shit, got distracted by Facebook, walked outside to check out the scenery, decided it was an awesome day to go to the pool, pool'd, Instagram'd, drank some wine, and then came home with intention to get more chapter writing done. And, what did I actually accomplish when I sat down again? Effing nada.

Started editing blogs.
And started writing this one.

Fuck.

There goes my whole day I had to get a chapter done, and what do I do? Fuck it right off. Yup, gave this day one hell of a hand job, but the full lay two-way would have been sweet. At least I then would have felt satisfied...

So, what is my problem here? I seriously have the entire chapter mapped out in my head. From beginning to end, but I cannot find the motivation to write it down. It's like I am fumbling with the keys trying to make words out of the pictures in my head.
And believe me when I say, this chapter is going to rock!
I just can't seem to get it down.
*sigh*

So, yeah, I'm not really block'd, just distracted. I know what I want to say, but trying to get it down on computer screen is like pulling teeth.

I am just gonna go out on a limb and say that the answer to my problem is a Vacation! *kneels in prayer position*
Yeah, that That will help... More distractions, that's just what I need.

But, on the other hand, because it is summer, my day job is at it's slowest. The bar trade in my part of the world is super suffering. No one is going out to party because school is about to start, so I have to work almost double the shifts to make the money I am used to making the rest of the year.

Bottom line?
I am tired, overworked, bored as fuck, and without motivation.
Welcome to my Writer's Block.

Fml.
*firstworldwoes*

No comments:

Post a Comment